Hair today, gone tomorrow.

Short hair by SashaWarner
Short hair, a photo by SashaWarner on Flickr.

Social media has spoken. I chopped my hair. It's gone. Out with the old and in with the hot new hair trend that started at least two years ago. But lets not forget, I live in Lanark County, so here I'm totally setting the trend. (Unless, you count the disproportionate amount of retirees that live in Perth. They all have short hair. And in that case, I'm like at least 15 years late.)

When I asked Nevin, what I should do, he said I should have hair like him. When I asked the question on Facebook, 100% of respondents (all five of them) said, "yes ma'am, chop it off into a pixie cut." Unless they were confused and said "yes ma'am leave it long," in which case this was an entirely misguided waste of 2 years of growth.

Here's the thing. I have no time. Or at least I'm about to have no time. Next week I return to work and in the mornings I can not picture myself straightening my hair while I pursue the toddler who is unraveling a roll of toilet paper down the hall, telling the pre-schooler to stop chasing the dog with the plastic golf club, and mopping the puddle of piddle that the dog let go accidentally while fearing for its life just before ducking under our bed. Our bed in our carpeted, now pee scented, bedroom in this "fictitious" account. Did you follow all that? Me neither, and that's why I cut my hair. With ultra-short hair, I can waltz into work looking totally put-together -- some might even say sane-looking -- despite the hurricane that will be the Warner house morning non-routine.

My mom - bless her heart - says she thinks it makes me look younger. Works out well for her, because that would make her younger by default. Personally, I'm pretty sure it makes me look like a boy. A cross between the kid that played Kevin Arnold in the Wonder Years and Edward Norton minus his squinty eyes. I used to be the kid with the mushroom cut and crooked glasses, so this is entirely up my alley. Boy is a total improvement. From where I've been anything, as long as it involves mascara and a bra, will always be an improvement.


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